Ten proverbs for daily living
- Safety First: wear your helmet, buckle your seat-belt, tie your shoelaces, and always use a drink coaster before putting a beverage down on mommy’s nice end-table.
- Learn to listen before speaking. You have two ears and one mouth which means you need to listen twice as much—especially to me, listen to me. Plus, people will just assume you’re smarter if you stay the strong, stoic type.
- Inactivity kills. Get moving. But always use the potty before going on a long trip.
- Wash your hands you filthy animal. Ain’t nobody got time to be sick.
- Always do the right thing—which is usually the harder thing—and never assume that someone else will do it. Just be the one who does it.
- Drink Dunkin’, not Starbucks.
- Try not to care too much about what other people think. People are dumb. Except me and your mother. And your grandparents and maybe some of your other relatives. Also, probably the pastor. I guess there’s a handful of people that aren’t total nincompoops, but still.
- Write down your goals and plans to accomplish them. Write down thoughts, inspirations, prayers, and checklists. When writing a list for the Internet, be sure to try and include an even 10 things like the “Top Ten List of Top Ten Lists.”
- When you grow up and leave home, please remember to call your mother. You don’t have to call me.
- Start and end each day with gratitude.
“Hear, my son, your father’s instruction,
and forsake not your mother’s teaching,
for they are a graceful garland for your head
and pendants for your neck.” (Proverbs 1:8-9)